What does plagiarism mean anyway?

Good morning all,
I have a bug up my you-know-what this morning. Another plagiarism case, another oh, it's all just a misunderstanding, nobody's done anything wrong, really.

What a lot of hooey! (And I'm sure many people have said this before me, like The Smart Bitches)

I wonder sometimes, why there is not more outrage? Perhaps writers are a bit paranoid. Perhaps they're scared to go hard on plagiarism because maybe one day in the future they might unwittingly do it themselves? Yep, I've got my hand up for that. I am scared one day I'll use words that aren't my own. I do my best not to. When I have a really great thought and think 'it's too good, it can't be mine' I google it and see if it really is mine. It takes all of five minutes.

Maybe if writers jump up and down and shout too much, people might start putting those writers' books through search engines to see what comes up? Because the internet can be like a feeding frenzy sometimes. Cue images of blood in the water and circling sharks etc.

Maybe they just don't get it?

Plagiarism is when you use someone else's words verbatim (or substituting a couple of words but otherwise doing a nifty cut and paste) without saying whose words they are. That's pretty much it in a nutshell. You're using someone else's words and central ideas and pretending they're yours.

If I say 'nobody likes a smart arse' I could be quoting just about anyone. That phrase is pretty much in common usage so there's no need to attribute. If I then go on to prove God doesn't exist because without faith God is nothing and then I prove black is white and get run over at a zebra crossing - that's plagiarism. Those are Douglas Adams' words, more or less. His wit and sweat and mental toil, and I've ripped him off because I can't be arsed thinking up something clever myself. Those words belong to Douglas Adams (and now his estate, and probably author Eoin Colfer who is authorised to write the next Hitch Hiker's books). On a side note, how awesome is that!!!!!

Plagiarism is stealing, whether it's intentional or not. "I didn't mean it" means nothing. "I was talking with my friends and they came up with the line, and they said I could use it." Same deal. (And in any case, why not attribute your friend instead?)

There is no real word limit to plagiarism. It's not like you can quote up to 50 words and not have to attribute it. If you are using someone else's words, you need to say so. If you're using those words in a non fiction newspaper article, then all you have to do is say 'as fred bloggs said on coolestkiwiblog.co.nz, 'the world's going to hell faster than I can shear a sheep' and I agree with him.

See how I managed to use someone else's quote and attribute it? (And I don't know if there really is a Fred Bloggs, but you get the drift).

Plagiarism means you need to say whose words they are. If your name appears at the top of the article, you're claiming all the words are yours. Now, we all use the same sorts of words because most of us use English or Cantonese or Engrish, but having your name on the by-line means the order of those words and therefore the thought processes behind them are fundamentally yours.

Yes, we are human, yes we all are capable of making big mistakes. I'm sure I'll make some clangers as time goes on. And when I do, feel free to tar and feather me as a hypocrite because I will probably deserve it.

Because stealing is wrong.